Before There Was You
by Kosaka
Summary: (rating may be subject to change) How strong is love? Can it really withstand all obstacles? Even family? Sess/Kuma, Inu/Kag, Miro/San(maybe)...4th in "This crazy thing called love" arc. Ch3 up
1. Dreams of Forgotten Times

Disclaimer: nope, still don't own Inuyasha, but thanks for asking.  
  
A/N and Summary: Even though I only got one review for "Falling Over You", *frowns*, I decided to go ahead with the sequel, and after wracking my brain, I think I figured something out that might work nicely for the next step.  
  
The fics in this arc are(in order):  
  
1. Falling Over You  
  
2. All He Needs(takes place within the time frame of "Falling Over You")  
  
3. After Love(2 small vignettes. . .sorta)  
  
4. Before there was You (this fic)  
  
5. Love Like Water(to come after this fic. . . not a love story exactly, but. . . sort of a one-shot-can you call it a one-shot if it's part of an arc? I just don't know, anyways-that I got the idea for when I got the idea for this one, but I have to write it after since reading "Love Like Water" before reading "Before there was You" will totally ruin "Before there was You". I know I know, I'm being cryptic, but I can't really say much about this fic without ruining the story for you!)  
  
Sesshomaru and Kuma love each other very much, having the prospect of a beautiful family with their adopted daughter, Rin. But there seems to be something blocking the path to their happiness, something, emotionally, between them that they can't surmount, and neither of them knows what it is. Is love really as strong as everyone says? Is it a bond that can overcome everything, even family? (and if I tell you any more, I'm gonna ruin the story).  
  
***************  
  
"Before there was You"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter One: Dreams of Forgotten Times  
  
***************  
  
They never talked about family. It was a taboo, something looming in the air beyond their reach. Her, because she couldn't remember, and him, because he didn't want to. And that small difference, made all the difference. Their reasons for silence became a barrier between them, keeping them apart. And neither of them could place or name the problem, they just wanted to be rid of it, wanted to be strong enough, and weak enough, to hold one another without obstacles.  
  
It was the two of them, and it was Rin, but they weren't a family yet, even the young girl knew that. They weren't a family. They didn't know how to be a family. In truth, they were falling away from one another, spending more time apart, trying to decipher the silences, and these past few weeks had been the worst.  
  
It was something. . . something almost tangible between them, a thickness in the air that had been building and building but never quite got ready to erupt. It made Kuma nauseous, made her feel like she couldn't breathe. As for Sesshomaru, these past few weeks, silently, when he was alone, he was learning to cry. Nothing had ever hurt this much. It was a kind of pain he didn't know was possible.  
  
But no, they never talked about family. They didn't know they were supposed to.  
  
*****************  
  
Drowsily, Kuma rested her head on Sesshomaru's shoulder while Kagome continued the one-sided conversation she'd been holding for the past thirty minutes. The air was so tense it was almost stagnant, and for once, this wasn't because of the tension between the two brothers. In fact, Kuma and Kagome were surprised to find that not only were both men still alive, but the silence between them had gone from the glaring and muttering that they had left to something almost companionable. . . brotherly, even. They had thought leaving the pair alone would have resulted in bloodshed and injury to both parties, but Kuma had said simply, "eh, don't worry about it Kagome, let the boys have their fun. Just remember boys, don't kill each other, or we'll never forgive you." Well, they hadn't killed each other, but what they had done was beyond the girls' collective fathoming.  
  
"We're meeting the others in the village by the well tomorrow, right Kagome?" Kuma asked blearily. "Yeah. It'll be great. Shippo and Miroku and Sango. . .you haven't seen them in so long, and they're really excited about it."  
  
"Hmn," Kuma yawned affirmatively. "It'll be nice to see everyone again," she said softly, nuzzling deeper into Sesshomaru's shoulder, trying to forget the day's earlier worries. She loved him, she really did . . . so much.  
  
He gave her a gentle kiss on the crown of her head, taking in the scent of her hair as he did so and wrapping his arm a bit more tightly about her, his eyes sad, though you'd have to know him pretty well to notice.  
  
"Mn. Sleepy," she muttered.  
  
"Then sleep," Sesshomaru said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, which, it may well have been.  
  
"Don't wanna," she mumbled, but already she was drifting into dream. Jaken and Rin had been asleep for at least an hour, Rin curled up in Sesshomaru's lap and Jaken just within the circle of firelight, uncomfortable yet with being near Inuyasha and "that miko girl".  
  
'To look at them, you would think they were just a happy couple, but you can see it in their eyes. Something's wrong,' Inuyasha observed silently, though he'd never say anything like that out loud.  
  
Kagome smiled warmly at a now sleeping Kuma and said, "maybe she has the right idea. We'll be going far tomorrow, and we have to make it there on time for the celebration. It wouldn't do at all for Kuma to miss her own birthday party!" a mischevious, excited light danced in Kagome's eyes, causing a humored "keh" to come out of Inuyasha's mouth.  
  
"Hey, you're laughing at me, aren't you?" she accused.  
  
"Uh huh. Let's sleep now," he replied, pulling Kagome close to him.  
  
With a mental sigh, Sesshomaru allowed his eyes to drift closed and sleep to claim him.  
  
***************  
  
Falling. She was falling again. What was it about this dream that kept coming back to her. It made her shiver in her sleep.  
  
Kuma knew how she had lost her parents. It was a plane crash, and since she was very young, she didn't remember it well. It disturbed her a little that she couldn't remember their names, but she just took it for what it was worth, it was traumatic, her mind was blocking out everything that happened before that day. Besides, she was only three back then, so it's not as if she was likely to remember anyway.  
  
So why then, this dream of falling. This vivid dream where she reaches out her arms, calling "papa!" and sees something black, something resembling hair disappear through the slender block of light before her, and then, to blackness, she awakens. Always to blackness. And this blackness is the end of her dream.  
  
Her eyes flutter open to see concern etched on Sesshomaru's face. "The dream again?" he asks.  
  
She just nods distantly.  
  
"You know if you want to talk about it. . ." he begins to say when she nods and pulls herself out of his embrace, rocking back into a kneeling position and rolling up to the balls of her feet. Standing, staring out at the stars for a moment. She had had this dream for as long as she could remember, but it was her secret, she couldn't bring herself to share it with anyone, not even him. . . because, it was frightening, but she wanted to keep it. It was hers alone. This terrible dream, it was somehow. . .precious to her.  
  
"I'm going for a walk," she says flatly, heading away from camp.  
  
'Why won't you talk to me?' Sesshomaru wonders, staring after her with longing. This dream, whatever it was was the thing that was tearing them apart. 'What can be so bad that you feel you have to keep it a secret from the one who loves you most?' He frowned slightly and sighed.  
  
Inuyasha opened his eyes and stared at his brother for a moment, seeing Kuma's form disappearing into the trees. Unsure of whether to speak or not, he decides, finally, that he can't not. "Something wrong?" he whispers to Sesshomaru.  
  
Sesshomaru's eyes dart up and stare at Inuyasha for a moment, as if deciding what the intention of the question is. Rin cuddles deeper into Sesshomaru's hip, still fast asleep as he absently brushes some hair from her face.  
  
Finally, his lips part and he says quietly. "I have this recurring nightmare in which she's walking away from me. Perhaps it is a nightmare because it is far too close to the truth for my liking."  
  
"Ses. . ."  
  
"Go back to sleep, Inuyasha."  
  
*************  
  
Naraku closed his eyes distatefully and turned his head away, waving the girl off. "That's enough, Kanna," he said flatly, standing and staring out the window as the girl left.  
  
He could feel the bile rising in his throat.  
  
'Enough, Oni Gumo. My affairs are none of your concern.'  
  
The human in him laughed bitterly at the being that had become the most evil creature alive. 'Just admit it. You can't help yourself, when it comes to that one.'  
  
'Don't be ridiculous. It's been a long time. I feel nothing any longer,' he lied to himself.  
  
'You're glad you failed to kill her.'  
  
'Shut up.'  
  
'It bothers you that she is in pain.'  
  
'Shut up!'  
  
'She is precious to you.'  
  
"SHUT UP! IT'S NOT TRUE!" Naraku hissed angrily, losing control of himself as he slammed his fist into the wall, causing it to shatter and break away. "It's not true." Breathing deeply he calmed himself. "Curse you, Oni Gumo. Curse you and your wretched human heart," he whispered. "I will be rid of you soon enough."  
  
'And until then?'  
  
'Until then, I will. . .' Naraku gritted his teeth together in an uncharacteristic sneer. He hated this side of himself more than anything. '. . .protect her from Ajika.'  
  
***************  
  
well, that's not EXACTLY how I thought that chapter would go, but all in all I suppose I'm satisfied enough with it. It's only the first chapter after all. Can't say I have any inkling as to how long this sequel is gonna be, but I'll just run with it.  
  
Now, you've read chapter one, so go on and hit that little "submit review" button and stop making me beg. Oh and um, since at this point I think we can officially call this an arc, I'm trying to think of a good title for it. So if anyone has any ideas I'd be more than happy to hear what they are. 


	2. Birthday Wishes

Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, just love 'em.  
  
"Before there was You"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Two: Birthday Wishes  
  
"Why are we going to the tavern? I thought Kaede's hut was the usual place to stop first," Kuma said, eyeing Kagome with all due confusion.  
  
"Well, we decided it was time for a change," Kagome retorted as she gestured for Kuma to go in first.  
  
The cougar hanyou's jaw went slack for a moment as she blinked off her disbelief. There were paper lanterns and. . . roast boar. . . and. . . balloons, which Shippo was trying desperately to blow up, to little avail, and which Miroku scowled at every time the tiny knot managed to slip through his fingers and deflate the orb a little more. "I believe it dislikes me," he scowled at the red thing from Kagome's era before seeing the group who just entered the doorway. And there was cake. Kuma blinked.  
  
"What is all this?" she asked in disbelief.  
  
"Kagome told us birthday celebrations were common in the place you come from," Sango said, frowning slightly at Kuma's confusion. She didn't appear to be familiar with this particular custom.  
  
"You. . . threw me a birthday party?"  
  
Inuyasha's eyes darted between Kagome and Kuma for a moment. He remembered birthday parties, Kagome had gone home to have one a few months ago, and it was the night of the full moon, so Inuyasha had gotten to go with her. He liked it, because there was lots of food. . . they hadn't had any ramen at Kagome's party, but they had lots of other tasty foods, and this fizzy drink called soda that made him feel a little giddy. But Kuma just looked confused and some weird emotion that wasn't quite sad, but was. . .sort of stuck for words.  
  
"Yeah," Kagome said. "Kuma, it's okay, right?"  
  
"It's great. I. . . wow. Nobody's ever thrown me a birthday party before. I guess I'm just a little shocked."  
  
"Nobody? Ever?" Shippo asked bouncing over.  
  
Kuma just shook her head vaguely before recovering her wits and saying, "this is great though! Look at all the lanterns! They're so pretty, it's like a festival! And all the food looks so good!" She turned to Kagome with an impish grin and said, "I can't believe you brought balloons," before taking one, inflating it and moving to tie the knot but popping it accidentally with her claws. "Oops. Well, I guess it's a little different, the way I am now," she said before inflating another balloon and trying to navigate the knot properly. It took some doing, but she finally got the blue balloon tied at the top and gently popped it up in the air. "Comeon Rin, Shippo! Don't you wanna play? Don't let that balloon hit the ground, kay!" she cheered and the children were off, hitting the balloon gently around the tavern. "And keep it away from the lanterns or it'll start a fire!" she called after them. "Hm. I used to love that game when I was younger," she smiled nostalgically. "You guys shouldn't have done all this though. It's too much, you know."  
  
"There are presents too!" Shippo said as he jumped onto the table, tapping the balloon to keep it in the air.  
  
Kuma gave Kagome a lecturing look and said, "why'd you have to go telling them about that part huh? Presents, I haven't done anything to deserve that, and besides I don't NEED anything. Hey, whatever though, let's just eat, 'kay! I'm starving!" she said before dragging Sesshomaru after her towards where the food was laid out.  
  
"Haven't done anything?" Kagome whispered, leaning against Inuyasha's shoulder. "Yeah right. She just can't accept that nothing's wrong and be happy."  
  
"When you're sad and alone for a long time, sometimes it's hard to accept it, when everything falls into place suddenly," Inuyasha whispered back. That's how it had been for him.  
  
"I guess so. . ."  
  
"You're acting strangely tonight," Sesshomaru said.  
  
"Am I?" Kuma pondered this quietly for a moment. "I guess it's just, all this," she said, waving her hand in the air. "Birthday parties, cake, balloons. It makes me think of things that I thought I'd put behind me a while ago."  
  
"Like?"  
  
"Oh, you know. Nothing important. Just. . . gets me thinking is all."  
  
"Why won't you ever tell me anything about your past?" Sesshomaru asked, sighing mentally. She was closing herself off again.  
  
"Why should I dwell on something that I can't effect? That's the way it is with you, isn't it? Or is it?" she stared into his eyes for a moment, noticing a deeper pain there. "No. I suppose that's not the way it is at all for you."  
  
Kuma stood. "That sort of thing just, isn't very important to me. It isn't very important to me at all. And maybe it's far too important to you, Sess. Maybe that's why it hurts so much, the way we are."  
  
Her expression shifted quickly as she grinned widely at Shippo and Rin and walked over to them. "Hey you two! Are you tired out already?" she called to them, crouching down to their level and having some unimportant conversation with the children.  
  
'Because I can see how much you care about it, how much you want to know, who I was, before there was you,' she thinks sadly, while keeping up the cheerful front.  
  
Miroku took a seat and put a piece of cake in front of Sesshomaru. There was no end to how strange it was, the youkai not being the enemy anymore, but in that vein, he thought a bit of advice may be useful.  
  
He took a bit of his own cake before saying, "you shouldn't push so much. It can't be easy, not knowing where you come from, you know."  
  
This had gotten Sesshomaru's attention and he glared at the monk pointedly, instructing him to continue without saying anything.  
  
"It's none of my business, anyway," the monk said casually with his usual insipid cheer, looking as if he was just having any casual conversation. "But if Kuma can't remember her parents, like Kagome says, it probably is less-than-wise to force the issue."  
  
Sesshomaru's eyes widened a fragment of an inch. 'Doesn't remember. . .?' It hurt though, hearing it from the monk instead of from her.  
  
'So he didn't know after all. No wonder they seem so tense around one another. Family is very important to Sesshomaru, obviously, but for Kuma. . .' Miroku heaved a mental sigh. 'I hope they can find a compromise on the matter. Kuma deserves to be happy.'  
  
Almost without warning, Miroku got up and departed, waving and calling out "Sango!" before disappearing and leaving Sesshomaru with the new information and his thoughts. And Sesshomaru came to a conclusion at last. 'Kuma, if you don't know, that's one thing. If you don't care, that's one thing. But I still want you to talk to me. To tell me what the things are that don't matter to you, and if you don't have a family, then let me in, let me be your family, me, and Rin. We're you're family now, so why. . . why do you keep pushing us away with that false happiness and that imitation of a smile? I want to make you happy. I do. But you won't let me. Please let me make you happy, Kuma, my beautiful Kuma. How much longer will you force me to endure your silence? I want to know you.'  
  
Naraku had kept himself well-hidden, watching from a distance, listening. It didn't matter to him, SHE didn't matter to him. No, not at all. But something, some impulse, drew him here tonight. And he couldn't pry himself away. He knew it was dangerous, if Ajika found out that the girl was still alive he'd only be causing her more trouble, but he just. . . it had been so long and he. . .wanted to see her. On this day especially.  
  
'Why today?' he wondered.  
  
And that other voice, laughed at him, reminding him, 'why today indeed? Have you forgotten. Today was the day, eighteen years ago.'  
  
And both voices said simultaneously, one with reasonable calm, the other with a suddenly realized shock as his eyes widened slightly and he stifled a small gasp, 'today was the day she was born.'  
  
He watched silently as she snuck out of the small hut and breathed in the night air, staring up at the wreath of stars that crowned the night sky. It was, within all reasoning, a time of night when humans and youkai alike usually slept. But they were both awake still, or again.  
  
She shivered under the weight of that dream. 'I don't care,' she told herself. 'It doesn't matter to me at all.' But it mattered. It really did matter. Because no matter how many times she told herself it was insignificant, unimportant, she really did want to know. 'Who am I? Where do I come from? Somehow, I feel like that dream is the key to. . .everything?'  
  
Naraku leaned forward slightly. 'Is this really the same girl? Where is her dark hair? Where is her innocent smile?'  
  
Obviously, her youkai blood had been drawn out. That was the intention behind the blade she now bore, but. . . the innocence he remembered was gone, replaced by something, false. He didn't realize he had sighed aloud at this until he noticed her posture stiffen.  
  
"Who's there?" she said. "Come out."  
  
He fought with himself over it a moment, then decided to remove himself from his place in the nearby foliage.  
  
"My apologies for interrupting your ruminations," he said fluidly.  
  
"Who are you?" she asked, eyes narrowing.  
  
He felt a pang in his chest that he didn't understand at first before his mind said softly, sadly, 'she doesn't remember you. . . of course she doesn't remember you. It's been what, fifteen years?'  
  
"No one important," he said. "Just someone who was having trouble sleeping, as you yourself were, I assume."  
  
"You're full of it. I know everyone in this village, and you aren't from it. I'll ask again, who are you?"  
  
"I am. . ." he paused, trying to decide whether or not it was wise to say, a mental battle ensued and the side of him that he despised won the battle. ". . . your father, Kuma."  
  
Kuma stared at him blankly for a moment, perhaps a bit suspiciously, but she made no sign of speaking. Almost two full minutes passed in silence before he decided finally to speak again. And not knowing what to say, he was surprised by the words that came out of his own mouth. "I wanted to wish you a happy birthday."  
  
Well, that's a little bit of a cliffy, isn't it? Just a little. Anyway, next chapter coming soon, I hope. Any opinions? Questions? R&R is always appreciated. Till next time, Happy Haunting. ~Banshee Puppet~ 


	3. The Witch of Kunukanai

"Before there was You"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Three: The Witch of Kunukanai  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
In the Last Chapter:  
  
"I am. . ." he paused, trying to decide whether or not it was wise to say, a mental battle ensued and the side of him that he despised won the battle. ". . . your father, Kuma."  
  
Kuma stared at him blankly for a moment, perhaps a bit suspiciously, but she made no sign of speaking. Almost two full minutes passed in silence before he decided finally to speak again. And not knowing what to say, he was surprised by the words that came out of his own mouth. "I wanted to wish you a happy birthday."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Kuma gaped for a long few moments, jaw slack. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to feel at first, but it wasn't long before her body decided on pure, unadulterated rage. Who the hell did this guy think he was?!?! Her father, as if! She wasn't even from this time! Her father was Ayame. . . Ayame. . . her mind grappled by a name. 'Ooooooooo! Who cares already! Mr. Ayame, Ayame-san.' Whatever the case, this obviously wasn't him. He was about a thousand years early to be claiming her the fruit of his loins, whatever the case. A voice in the back of her mind cringed and said, 'ew. Fruit of loins. Why'd I have to go thinking about that. Gross.' Kuma may not remember her parents, but that didn't mean she was comfortable thinking about the method of her creation. Thinking about your parents having sex is just sort of foul, regardless.  
  
Finally, words clipped, she spoke. "Well. Mission accomplished. You can leave now," she said, and with an arrogant flip of her head which she used to get her hair out of her face, she turned with a slight "hmph" and began walking away from him.  
  
"You don't believe me." He was surprised by the deadpan voice that came out of his throat. 'Of course she doesn't believe me. When did I become a bumbling idiot?'  
  
"Oh, it's not that, exactly," she said steadily, with a sweetness that bordered on venomous, stopping her stride but not turning to look back at him. "It's more like. . . I couldn't care less." The way she said those words, it seemed as if they were aimed at provocation. He wanted her to explain. They stood for a long time, just lost in the silence before he asked her why.  
  
"A father isn't someone who just happens to be of the same blood as you. A father cares. A father protects. That's what they do. It's just. . . in their nature. You're my father? Yeah right. I don't have a father."  
  
And this time, when she walked away, he let her. Staring at her retreating figure, he sighed again, "would that that were true," he said. "I would make it true in a second, if I could."  
  
The memory of the child it took him almost three years to kill surfaced in him, his Kuma, his little kitten, and he knew that he cared, and hated that he cared. Leaving the village he thought, 'I wish I'd killed you back then. I should have done it sooner, and made sure you wouldn't walk back into my life like this. Because before there was you, I was heartless. Before there was you, I was free.'  
  
But suddenly, the small, tugging fear clutches his heart again and forces him to turn around. He lands in front of her.  
  
With a disgruntled sigh she asks, "cripes, what is it now?"  
  
"There's something else I wanted to tell you, but you made me forget until just now," he said, putting a hand on her shoulder. She flinched and stiffened at the touch, but didn't move away from it. That would be admitting defeat, which she wasn't about to do.  
  
"Well?" she asked, prodding him to spit it out already.  
  
"Beware the witch of Kunukanai, Kuma," he said seriously. "If she finds you, she'll kill you. And she's very strong. Perhaps even stronger than me."  
  
He felt the urge to kiss her brow, but shoved it back. Even if she wasn't taller than he was, she would never allow it. HE would never allow it. 'I'm being terribly foolish, and weak. . . I'm being awfully weak right now, what is my plan for all this, exactly? Do I even have one?'  
  
"Stronger than you? I'M probably stronger than YOU. And I'm not very strong at all," she mocked.  
  
"You would be surprised, at just how strong I am," he scowled darkly. Now she was mocking him. His own daughter was mocking him.  
  
"Listen. I'm gonna ask you one last time, and none of this "your father" crap. Who are you, really?"  
  
"I am Naraku," he answered steadily before turning to leave. "And I am also your father, whether you choose to believe so or not. I pushed you in a well when you were hardly three years old. Unfortunately for me, I seem to have chosen the wrong one," he said flatly, this time walking away from her, and his hair billowing as he turned in the breeze reminded her of something familiar, something black, something like hair, hair passing over a lip of open light as she called out "papa!" before the blackness consumed her.  
  
She shivered. Not because she was cold, or because he creeped her out of for any of the usual reasons, but because. . . what he said. . . it could be true. And because, deep down, she wanted to know if it was.  
  
"Kunukanai hm?" she whispered, looking up at the stars again. "I'll be waiting for you, whoever you are, witch of Kunukanai."  
  
-----------  
  
Akija threw the smokey crystal ball across the room, her golden eyes flared in rage to a deep red for a moment, but faded back, her near platinum hair fell in long plaits around a sinuous feminine body dressed in an elegant navy kimono, the markings on her face, delicate pastels, were nearly invisible, save when she was angered so, as she was now, then they flooded with sudden color, peach stripes, and a simple pink diamond on her forehead; right now, they looked bright orange and deep red, but again, this faded quickly. 'This was infuriating,' she thought with a huff as one of her more nondescript servants went to retrieve the skull-encased orb for her. She knew the girl lived, but she couldn't find her now! The orb had shown her the hanyou child before, so why not at this time, what was concealing her now?  
  
It had been a pure accident that she had made this discovery, in truth. She had heard of a miko who travels through time and possessed much of the shikon no tama, which, of course, any evil demon in their right mind would covet, and she was no different. Besides wanting to keep it away from that worthless Naraku, of course. She had asked the ball, the Kunukanai, to show her the "girl who travels through time" and she had been given an image of her own daughter. Needless to say, she was a bit surprised, but she decided to play a little game. The girl was strong enough to survive at bizarrely disproportionate odds, perhaps she could bend her to her will. And if not, killing her would be easy enough.  
  
"Haioh, contact the swordsmith. I want to know why our little trinket is not working properly."  
  
"As you wish Mistress Ajika," the man who stood in the corner of the room bowed, dark shaggy ponytail flopping as he did so, silver eyes piercing and hypnotic, somehow. . . unnatural.  
  
"And Haioh," she said as he moved to depart. "Use whatever means necessary to get the answers I desire."  
  
Haioh nodded. "I understand."  
  
----------  
  
Kuma stood out in the cool night breeze for a long time, ruminating on the bizarre night and the figure of Naraku. "Keh. Like I care," she scoffed before turning back into the hut and moving to go back to sleep.  
  
Inuyasha sniffed and stared up at her, confusion setting in his features, then caution. "You smell like Naraku," he said. "Why?" He would have been louder, yelled, but he didn't want to wake Kagome, who was nestled into his side.  
  
"Like it's any of your business," Kuma said flatly.  
  
"You smell like my worst enemy and it's none of my business?!? LIKE HELL!!" he half-hissed, still trying to be quiet, but wanting very badly to get up and scream, start shaking her.  
  
"Whatever, puppy. I don't care about weaklings like that guy at all."  
  
'She's hiding something.'  
  
"Kuma so help me, if you don't talk. . ."  
  
"If I don't talk you'll what?" she snapped at him. "My life is my own. Just do me a favor and. . . LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!!" she hollered at him, causing him to jump and waking up everyone in the tent. "Keh. Whatever. I'm outta here," she said before storming out of the hut.  
  
As she ran full speed from the village, not knowing where she was going, or why, her mind hollered angrily. 'I don't need them anyway! I don't need anyone! Like they would understand! They wouldn't understand. Nobody understands. NOBODY UNDERSTAND AT ALL!!!' And she stopped in the open field, letting out a loud, mournful roar before realizing where she was.  
  
"The dry well. I wonder if. . ." She was going to say, "I wonder if I can find the answers I'm looking for by going back for a little while," but she wouldn't even fathom that possibility. "No," she said. "I'm never going back there. Never." But the fact was, she didn't know where to go right now. She knew that Inuyasha was right, that she owed Sesshomaru so many explanations, that Rin would miss her if she woke up and found that she wasn't there, but she'd already stormed off, so she couldn't go back right away. Best to let herself cool off a bit first. So she crouched down where she stood and took a few long, deep breaths, trying to decide where to go from here.  
  
----------  
  
okay, short chapter, I know, but it's sort of a.uh.prelude of things to come, and the next scene feels like it would fit better in the next chapter than this one, I think. *chews lip* It was a hard call to make, because nothing really happens in this chapter. But.with any luck the next chapter will be longer(I might know for sure if I had more than one scene of the next chapter figured out.) Mmn. . . not sure how long that one will take to write, since I'm also currently formatting some chapters for my FF8 fanfic and the idea for the next in my Sess/Kag series came to me. Yes, that's right, my sequel to my sequel of "Not that he Cared". But it's sad again! *frowns* Why do I have to go depressing myself all the time? Uh, anyways, something new will come soon, whatever the case. R&R if you want to try to inspire me to write quicker. I don't know if it'll work, but it might. . . and if you're good, I may even be inspired to get you a lollypop. . .  
  
Well, that's enough rambling. Till next time, Happy Haunting, Banshee Puppet 


	4. Almost Immortal

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. I do own, 11 ½ packs of juicy fruit. . .  
  
A/N: Once again, thanks to my few reviewers. Sometimes I really need to just know that people ARE actually reading this stuff to inspire me to continue. In this chapter, we get a little bit of actual plot and some angst. Not much else though. Wonder what'll happen in chapter five. *thinks about it and realizes she hasn't got a clue* Well, as always, r&r if you want to try to get me to update quicker. It might work. Heck, r&r is half the reason my other inu arc became an arc in the first place, so anything is possible. And okay, wow, I'm tired, ranting and have to be up in six hours. Going to bed now would be logical, wouldn't it? I never much liked logic. Bed, on the other hand. . . *yawns* Banshee Puppet signing off. _______  
  
"Before there was You"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Four: Almost Immortal  
  
_______  
  
Old habits die hard, as they say. That was something Inuyasha was discovering all too quickly as he found himself suddenly pinned by the throat to the wall of Kaede's hut by an older brother who looked as if he was ready to kill him. It could be a bluff, but given the rage in his eyes and the snarl escaping his lips, not to mention the hand tightening somewhat less than comfortably on his throat, Inuyasha doubted it.  
  
"Sesshomaru let Inuyasha go right now!" Kagome demanded, but wasn't even graced with a glare in her direction.  
  
"What did you do to my woman, hanyou?" he hissed dangerously. "And heavens help you if I don't approve of the answer."  
  
Inuyasha coughed and pulled on Sesshomaru's wrist, to little avail. 'Like I can talk with him clamped down on my windpipe!' He would have muttered enough curses to make a sailor blush, if he was capable of speech at all at this particular moment.  
  
Kagome was seriously considering sitting Inuyasha to get Sesshomaru's hand off of her boyfriend's throat, especially since his lips were starting to turn purple, Shippo had already tried biting Sesshomaru to no avail, and to Sango and Miroku's dismay, logic didn't appear to be working on the taiyoukai just now.  
  
It would seem though, that once again, Inuyasha owes his extremely too- fragile life to Rin, who chose that moment to wake up and gasp. Groggily, she asked, "what is Sesshomaru-sama doing to Uncle Inuyasha?"  
  
"I should think that is rather obvious, Rin," Sesshomaru said coolly.  
  
"No!" the girl whined. "Sesshomaru-sama can't kill Inuyasha-sama! Rin likes Inuyasha-sama!" she whined.  
  
With a disgruntled growl, Sesshomaru dropped his younger brother, with an unceremonious THUD to the ground. "Start talking," he grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning against the wall with a sneer pasted on his lips.  
  
"I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!!" Inuyasha snapped loudly. 'At least we know his vocal cords weren't damaged,' Sango thought, cringing at the too-loud tone. "YOUR woman walked in her with NARAKU'S SCENT all over her! YOUR woman, is hiding something, and I'll be damned if I'm not gonna find out what!"  
  
Sesshomaru's eyes widened a fraction. 'Naraku,' he growled mentally. 'What do you think you're playing at?'  
  
______  
  
"Greetings, Master Swordsmith. It has been many a moon since you have visited the castle to pay homage to our Lady Ajika," Haioh stated sweetly, giving an inward smirk at the fidgety youkai chewing his lip beside the old man, Zaru, if memory served him. He had been given to Oudabi as an apprentice, and a gift, by Ajika some ten years ago after his tribe had been, conveniently, wiped out. And Zaru happened to be a little skiddish, terrified of Haioh, truth be told.  
  
"I have been busy with the many tasks she's put to me in these past decades," Deraku Oudabi answered coolly. "I am, an old man, after all, and not as fit as I used to be. What does her ladyship desire?"  
  
"She would like to know why the sword does not do as expected," Haioh stated frankly.  
  
"The sword was designed to draw out youkai blood and evil tendencies. The first, it has done quite well. Unfortunately, the young lady I was bidden give the weapon to does not appear to have any evil tendencies," he said calmly, not looking the other demon in the eyes.  
  
Deraku Oudabi knew well enough what those eyes were capable of. He had seen them break much stronger men than himself. And he really had no desire to mention that there were other youkai who had also shown an interest in the weapon, and who had offered him things which, made him at least consider their proposals. And he also knew, it was the Kagura that hid the hanyou girl from Ajika's Kunukanai now.  
  
"You know, Master Swordsmith. It is rather rude to not look a person in the eyes when you speak to them," Haioh commented offhandedly, arms crossing his chest as he leaned against the wall with a small smirk.  
  
"It is also, young Master Haioh, rather rude to threaten a man in his own home. I know what your eyes can do. I have seen it break many men. But I'm telling you that the fault is not in the sword, but in the girl that it was given to. One who is kind can be enslaved to act on the will of one who is not so kind, but evil tendencies can not be drawn out of someone who possesses none of them."  
  
'The day that she draws the kagura in cold-blood. That is the day its task will be complete. And I do not believe she will ever do that. I do not believe that she can. She does not have it in her,' Oudabi thought.  
  
"Let us try this another way, Master Swordsmith," Haioh said easily. "How fond are you, of your apprentice?"  
  
"What!?!" The old man's back stiffened. 'Zaru!' He hadn't thought, hadn't noticed. Of course Zaru must have caught the gaze of those hypnotic eyes by now. And, in spite of himself, he cared for his apprentice, it was like having a very respectful grandson to pass on all your secrets to, even if, thanks to certain would-be-youkai with very powerful blood, it was not likely that you would die any time soon.  
  
Letting out a defeated breath, Deraku Oudabi turned around. "What do you want to know?" he asked, voice leaden and body tense.  
  
"Look into my eyes, swordsmith. I'll take the knowledge I need, to be certain you aren't lying to me. And should you. . . struggle. . .I have permission to use the full extent of my abilities, so I suggest you let me rape your mind quietly."  
  
The old man nodded. "Zaru, there is much work to be done. Take care of it while I'm entertaining our guest," he said flatly. And Haioh nodded, allowing the young wolf youkai to leave.  
  
Unnatural silver orbs expanded out the white of the eye, pupil fading into black shadowy clouds that drifted around the silver tempest seas behind them, and the old swordsmith fell easily to their sway.  
  
Haioh sifted through the man's mind, disregarding much that was unimportant, 'show me old man, the kagura.'  
  
He saw his own image, coming here to demand the sword be made in Ajika's name and let this pass quickly.  
  
Then another memory, that irritating servant of the taiyoukai of the west. "Sesshomaru-sama wishes a sword made," Jaken said, fidgeting slightly, but resolute. A conversation was held, payment was decided. Deraku Oudabi, at that time, wondered at his luck that he should gain monetary compensation for a sword he was already ordered to make.  
  
Haioh let the memory pass quickly. It was unimportant and harmless. It did not affect the kagura's purpose.  
  
Then, his mind hissed, as if burnt, as another memory came to the surface. 'Naraku.'  
  
The powerful hanyou stood before Deraku Oudabi. "I am willing to make a deal with you. Unlike Sesshomaru of the West, I know it is Ajika who demanded you make this sword, and I know who it is for. I would like to give you a gift, to see that it finds its proper owner," Naraku said.  
  
"A gift to do my job, how generous of you, Naraku," Deraku Oudabi had sai;, he knew there was a catch.  
  
"Two drops of my blood, demon. One, to use in the creation of the blade, and one, for your own purposes, whatever you desire," Naraku had said, smirking wickedly. "We both know you are growing old, sword-maker, and a single drop of my blood, it can make you, almost immortal."  
  
Oudabi had easily accepted this deal. Naraku's blood in the sword, he knew it would displease Ajika, but the bargain, to be almost immortal, it was too good to pass up. And now that very drop of blood protected the hanyou girl from her mother's eyes. 'I am a lucky man indeed,' Deraku Oudabi had thought at that time. But it seemed his luck was running out.  
  
Haioh hissed as he broke the contact. "I see. So it is in Naraku's promises you rest your life these days, Master Swordsmith," he said smoothly. "Ajika will hear of this betrayal. And then, we shall see whether or not your faith has been misplaced."  
  
_____  
  
Kuma was still by the well when Sesshomaru found her. She didn't know where to go, what to say. This well held so much meaning now. It was, in its way, both a place of dying and a place of being born. And yet, she knew, neither of these things was true.  
  
It was, however, the things which MIGHT be true that haunted her. What if he was? What if Naraku was her father. She had to admit that he bore a slight resemblance to her previous, more human form. But even in this. . . She was sure that she was just looking for things that weren't there. All the same, she couldn't help but wonder, what if it were true. What would it change? And she knew, in her heart, she was certain, the answer to THAT question was, 'It would change everything.'  
  
It would change everything because Naraku was their enemy, because Sesshomaru hated him, because he was Inuyasha's enemy, and because, if he WAS her father, she might not be able to harm him, in spite of everything, or because of it. And because she knew, no matter how tough she acted, how much she pretended it didn't affect her either way, it did. If he really was her father, if the dream was real, then it affected her; it mattered, and she hated that it mattered. 'Why is he doing this to me now, of all times?' she wondered with a frown when Sesshomaru came up behind her and knelt by her side.  
  
He said nothing. He'd been watching her sitting in the clearing for almost five minutes. She'd known he was there, and he knew that she knew that he was there, which she also knew. Confused yet? Sufficed to say, there weren't any secrets in the clearing that night, except for one, which hovered over everything, and which was Kuma's alone to bear.  
  
"He didn't hurt you?" Sesshomaru asked finally.  
  
They both knew who she meant. "No," she answered, her voice sounding somewhat hollow. "He didn't hurt me. I don't think he can."  
  
Sesshomaru furrowed his brow at her. What did she mean? And what had happened between herself and Naraku that had her so worked up. It wasn't like her to show so much, was all, but she was hurting, and it was a sort of hurt that radiated out onto everything, not the sort that was hidden so only she could feel it, so only he, who knew her best, could know that it was there. This was something much deeper.  
  
A long silence passed between them before he asked the question that had been looming in the air for weeks now.  
  
"You're leaving me, aren't you?"  
  
Kuma nodded. "I am."  
  
"For good?" his voice cracked slightly as he asked this.  
  
She looked at him now, the agony in her eyes so deep that she couldn't hide it with one of her false smiles and didn't try to. And as she turned away from him, he knew the answer. She didn't know.  
  
"I hope not," she whispered, standing. "Because I really do love you more than anything." She stared up at the stars again. "But. . .there is something that I have to do. I didn't realize it until just now but, it's too late for turning back. I will come back to you, if I can. I promise."  
  
"Don't make promises," he said simply. "It isn't like you to do that sort of thing."  
  
Kuma nodded. "Then I. . ." She stopped. She didn't want to say goodbye, and 'see ya around' might not be true either. What was she supposed to say, in this sort of situation, the sort of situation when the end was so up in the air, when everything felt this. . . anti-climactic. "Make sure to let Rin outside to play when it's nice. It isn't good for kids to be cooped up indoors all the time. And don't give Jaken such a hard time. He's annoying, but he works hard and he really respects you. When you get back to the estate, make sure to tell someone to clean the drapes. They know it needs to be done, but they won't do it unless you tell them to," she told him.  
  
Sesshomaru nodded. "I understand."  
  
And with that, Kuma walked away from him once again, this time, for longer than all the others, maybe even, for always. He didn't know. But there was something else that needed to be said.  
  
"Kuma, I hope you find what you're looking for."  
  
"So do I, Sess. So do I."  
  
And a wreath of darkness covered her swift retreat.  
  
______  
  
Well! That's the longest amount of time it has EVER taken me to write six damn pages. For all the time, I wanted to have a bigger chapter/update, but as usual, the work takes on a life of its own. I'm just so blocked lately, I dunno. All things Inuyasha seem to be somewhere just beyond my grasp. I hope to have the next chapter out soon, or chapter two of "A Fragile Heart" which is, as predicted, taking me forever to write, but I just don't know at this point. It was hard enough getting this far and I haven't the slightest idea what happens next at all! Well, poop. With any luck, adult swim will inspire me.  
  
'till next time, happy haunting, Banshee Puppet. 


	5. Dog Breath and Demon Ears

Disclaimer: Don't own Inu. Do own four mismatched decks of playing cards.  
  
A/N: Ah, four chapters, two reviews. That IS a little depressing, isn't it? Anyway, thank you for your continued support. There are a number of reasons that my updates have slowed down considerably. Firstly, and perhaps most importantly, I've gotten myself into too many projects! Haha. I have so many open and running fics right now that even someone who writes like a madwoman like I do, sadistic muse glaring over my shoulder all the while, can't pull out a chapter of each story every two or three days. I've decided to focus my energies a little more than usual and take the fics that are closest to finished and focus my energies on them first, so that I can then dive back into newer works. This process has already taken out my GW fic, "So This is Love", and "Before There was You" is the next logical choice, so lucky lucky, whoever is reading this fic. Once I'm down to two or three fics again I should be able to get stuff out a bit quicker. Second, I have I.F.W.B. just now. For anyone who needs a translation, that stands for Inuyasha Fanfic Writer's Block. I'm just totally stumped on all things Inuyasha right now, dunno why. But, maybe if Inu could stop by with tetsusaiga he can chop it down for me. *hopes and prays* And finally, another big one, I got a second job recently and am now working fifty hour weeks, though this isn't as much as it sounds, it's more than I'm accustomed to, and there are times when I have to choose between writing fanficiton and sleep. And on days when I get in from work at 12:30 am and have to be up for work again at 5 am, let's just say, sorry folks, sleep wins that one. I am doing my best though, so please please be patient with me. I PROMISE I WILL finish each and every one of my fics. It's just going to take a bit longer than anticipated.  
  
For anyone who is reading this (and not reviewing, you dorks) and finds the plot confusing, if you stick with me, I promise, by the end you will understand what is going on. I didn't want to let everything out right away and I know that as it stands there are a LOT of questions that are unanswered. Mysteries will be revealed as I proceed, and if any of my explanations don't make sense to you, then REVIEW AND TELL ME SO!!! I'll explain it better either to you personally in a notation, or in one of the future chapters of the fic. With all the time-hopping, things are sure to be a bit confusing, but I don't think any more confusing than the series, where time-hopping is the norm. (There I go with the babbling again.)  
  
Now, I'm not a huge fan of repeating myself, but since this is part of an arc, to prevent people from being too confused, I will, once again, list the fics in this arc in their proper order:  
  
"Falling Over You", "All he Needs", "After Love", "Before there was You"(this fic), "Love Like Water" (coming sometime after this fic is completed)  
  
And so, bleh, and et cetera. On with the story. . .  
  
~~~  
  
"Before There Was You"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Five: Dog Breath and Demon Ears  
  
~~~  
  
There was something she needed to do. She knew it better than anyone. Things that she needed to discover, but she had grown out of the habit of sleeping alone, so it was uneasily that she did so now. To find out the truth about Naraku and his relation to her, or lack thereof, this was her goal. And she had decided, certain things were worth the risks they entailed. She made this decision because, in truth, the only person who would have the answers she sought, was her, the witch of Kunukanai. Not that she knew where to start looking, but it was all she really had to go on.  
  
And her dreams were wretched these days. Since encountering Naraku, they seemed more vivid, and new dreams were beginning to surface. Small hands, covered with blood, a red world, a man and woman torn to bits on the floor, and eyes, silver eyes. They weren't Naraku's eyes, or hers, but they were eyes that she knew as well as she knew Sesshomaru's eyes, or Rin's. How did she know them? And whose were they? Those bright, omnipresent silver eyes.  
  
She awoke with a start and a gasp, instinctively looking down at her clawed hands. No blood, there was no blood there, but why did this surprise her? Why was she expecting to find blood on her hands? She'd never killed before, not really, her hands had never been covered with such messy, bloody death as that, though she'd seen it often enough, and though it was distasteful and she had an aversion to it, it was by no means grotesque to her. It was just so much of what living was that she'd come to expect it, hadn't cared much to say it was something forbidden, or something sacred. It just was. It just. . .was.  
  
But in her dream now, she saw silver eyes in a red world. Everything so vague. When she tried to latch onto an image, any image, it fell away from her. A woman's corpse, "m-momma?", mangled, torn to shreds, tragedy, heartache, confusion, and silver eyes in a red world, and she wakes up screaming as bloody claws scratch across her vision, drowning out the silver, and a small pink light pulses its way into her waking thoughts.  
  
She gasps. 'The. . .the shard!" her voice, a harsh whisper, echoes through the night. "It just. . .has to be, but. . .how? I need to know, even if I have to sell my soul to the devil himself, I need to know."  
  
~~~  
  
"Sesshomaru-sama? Where's Kuma?" Rin asks, wide brown eyes hopeful and pouty at the same time.  
  
"She went away Rin."  
  
"She took a trip? When's she coming back? Rin is gonna miss Kuma."  
  
"She isn't coming back Rin, not for a long time at least."  
  
Sesshomaru's breath caught in his throat and he frowned deeply. He knew that look she was giving him now only too well. 'Oh no. No. Don't cry Rin. Please don't cry. It. . . bothers me when you do that,' he thought. The girl's tears were an annoyance, the emotional nature of which he'd never bothered to put a name on. All he knew was that he didn't like it, and that she was already sniffling, eyes getting all watery and salty smelling, and she was about to cause that odd, uncomfortable feeling in the pit of his stomach, the one he never quite knew what to do about, and which, could not go away quickly enough for his liking.  
  
"Don't cry," he stated flatly.  
  
"You don't have to be so cold!" Kagome scolded him even as Rin hiccupped back her tears and ran over to the demon, hugging his leg. He didn't respond to it, but he allowed it, and from Sesshomaru, that was response enough, the girl knew.  
  
"What are you planning to do?" Miroku finally asked the question that was on all of their minds. Whether he showed it or not, the Western Lord was in pain, and he had shown it, a bit--when he returned this morning he had looked exhausted, weary, tragic, his habitual frown, a deeper almost-scowl. That the cold Western Lord could look like that, it wasn't something anyone had really fathomed before. And Inuyasha could see the echo of that pain, still fresh, in his eyes now as he gave Rin a pat on the head, standing closer to his older brother than he had in a very long time and said, "hey Rin, why don't you let Sesshomaru sit down for a bit huh?"  
  
"I do not need to sit," Sesshomaru tried to glare at Inuyasha. Sitting would be nice though.  
  
"Keh," was Inuyasha's answer as he plopped Rin in Kagome's arms and sat himself, crossing his arms over his chest. "Don't be so stubborn."  
  
Sesshomaru's lips tweaked slightly. "As I recall, brother, the stubborn one is you," he answered, seating himself rather more gracefully than the other and watching Rin sharing Kagome's lap with Shippo for a moment before Inuyasha said, "Answer Miroku's question. What are you going to do?"  
  
"Nothing," Sesshomaru answered flatly. "It is not my place to interfere."  
  
"That would be the wrong decision." Everyone jumped up at the sound of that voice. Tetsusaiga drawn before any further words could be spoken.  
  
"What is it that you want, Naraku?" Sesshomaru spoke levelly, but the venom on his voice was proof enough of his distaste for the hanyou.  
  
"I have come," Naraku said evenly, "to propose a temporary truce between our parties as we pursue the same goal."  
  
"Feh," Inuyasha was about to charge when Sesshomaru stopped him.  
  
"I want him dead as much as you do, brother, but I also want to know what he is up to," he said, staring coldly at the evil hanyou as if trying to read his very thoughts.  
  
"Think what you will of me, dog demon," Naraku said. "But I will not let that girl die. I am loathe to admit it, and more loathe to ask assistance in the task, but the witch of Kunukanai is someone even I, Naraku, do not take lightly."  
  
Sesshomaru couldn't explain the feeling that surged through his stomach at those words. But there was no doubting that his scent had been on her last night, or that there was something about him that she was keeping to herself. Was this. . . ? 'Am I jealous? Of Naraku? No. Of course not,' he thought. "Naraku desires to protect a hanyou girl. Interesting. But I'm sure there must be a motive behind it. What do you want from her?"  
  
"Fool," Naraku said a little bitterly. "Protecting her has been one of my most important motives, almost since the beginning. And I hate that it is. I will take on Ajika alone if I have to, but if I do so, then we will probably both die. And as much as you might rejoice my demise, Kuma is precious to you, is she not?"  
  
Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed. Of course she was, but that didn't make it any easier a pill to swallow when it was Naraku's voice laying that claim. What was he supposed to do? After a silence he says, "Ajika, is it? The witch of Kunukanai. You can slither back into the hole from whence you came, hanyou. I have no further need of you. I will not ally myself with the likes of you a second time. You cannot be trusted."  
  
"Believe what you will, Western Lord, but that child is precious to me as well," Naraku said before vanishing into thin air.  
  
~~~  
  
Kuma leaned on her sword at the intersection. She'd been wandering for days now, with no idea where to go. Her feet were tired, she had a headache, and at the moment, no patience for decisions. Not to mention this whole area wreaked of wolves, and though she couldn't tell you why, it was a scent she was not all too fond of. Something genetic, perhaps.  
  
"Where are you, witch of Kunukanai?" she mused quietly.  
  
~~~  
  
Kouga came to an abrupt stop as a particular scent came to his nose. Not many scents could make him stop like this. Kagome could, dog breath could, but this was neither of them. It wasn't even the scent of those damn birds of paradise. This was peculiar, because it was almost unheard of any longer.  
  
'A cougar youkai?' he almost wondered if he was smelling things. Everyone knew that the cougar youkai were all but extinct these days, and to his knowledge, all those that remained served that tyrant witch in the South. So what the hell was a cougar youkai doing this far north this close to winter. Didn't they hate the cold? Cougars had been the biggest nuisance to the wolf tribes around here for a long time, he recalled. But one day, they just sort of disappeared. And who had been behind that? He didn't know the details, but he had heard that it was a cougar witch with more power than one person ought to have. 'Ajika of the Kunukanai. She killed a lot of my tribe too back then, that bitch.'  
  
He decided to investigate. What he found was a young cougar demon sitting Indian style at an intersection in the road. She looked one way, looked the other way, cocked her head to one side and sighed slightly. "Man, this aimless wandering is getting me nowhere fast," she complained, standing and dusting herself off, slinging the kagura over her shoulder again and stiffening when she noticed a presence. She hadn't picked up the scent because it was the same as the scent that drowned these woods, but there was no mistaking that there was someone watching her.  
  
It was all Kouga could do not to laugh. THIS is what had concerned him so much? This hanyou? He almost fell over in amusement when she stood up and said, "I know you're there, so come out and stop wasting my time."  
  
'Keh. She's not bad,' he mused, showing himself.  
  
"What, praytell is a cougar hanyou doing this far North, I wonder," he slurred tauntingly.  
  
Kuma looked him over in a cursory manner and all but dismissed him. "I wouldn't know anything about the habits of cougar hanyou," she said vaguely. "Seeing as I've only been one for half-a-year or so. I'm trying to find someone who has answers that I want."  
  
Well now, this was a little interesting. "Oh reeallly? Do tell," he smirked mischievously.  
  
She wasn't going to bother, but then she decided, he seemed to be familiar with this area, maybe he would know something.  
  
"Oh! Asking the locals WOULD be smart, huh?" she laughed at her absentmindedness. "I'm looking for someone called 'the witch of Kunukanai'. You don't know where she is, do you?"  
  
Kouga's expression darkened, his posture stiffened. He'd just been thinking about her actually, weird. "What're you looking for her for?"  
  
"Well, she's got the answers that I'm looking for. If I'm to believe what I'm told, then she wants me quite dead, but that's a risk I'm just going to have to take. Not going with a very reliable source here, after all. I have to find her quickly before anyone can come try to stop me."  
  
Kouga thought about this for a few moments. The witch was very dangerous, but at the same time, she really did need to die, for what she'd done to his tribe so long ago, not that he was old enough to really take it personally, but still.  
  
"I know where she used to be. Whether she's still there or not, that's another question entirely. I guess I can take you there."  
  
"Why don't you just tell me the way. I don't want to get anyone else involved. There are a lot of strong people who are going to interfere anyway, so you'll only end up getting yourself killed, if I know them at all."  
  
Kouga raised an eyebrow at her. "Do these strong people have names?"  
  
"Sure do," she said. "Oh, you mean you want them?" she smirked at his "well, duh," expression.  
  
"Geez, I was kidding. . .dork. Sesshomaru will probably come looking for me first, and if he comes, Inuyasha'll definitely tag along with Kagome and Miroku and Sango and everyone. And of course, stupid Naraku is gonna try to get in my way too. It'd be nice if they just left me alone, but it's not really in their nature to do so."  
  
Kouga's jaw dropped a little farther with each name. Had he REALLY missed so much? She knew all these people. "You know dog breath? And Kagome?"  
  
"Sure. Kagome's my best friend."  
  
Kouga gave a cocky smirk. "Well then she's probably told you about me. My name's Kouga and. . ."  
  
"Nope, sorry, never heard of you," Kuma returned absentmindedly. "Kagome has boyfriend-brain though, so you shouldn't be insulted. She really only ever talks about Inuyasha. She's cute when she's happy like that though, so I don't mind."  
  
"b-b-b-BOYFRIEND!?!!!!" Kouga seethed.  
  
"Ow. Loud much?"  
  
~~~  
  
okay, this is pretty short..sorry about that. Will try to write another chapter soon. I didn't know what to call this one, but I thought "dog breath and demon ears" was a fun title for an introducing Kouga chapter. I wasn't actually going to use him in this fic, but I figured, why the hell not? I'm not an expert on his character yet though, so sorry if he's ooc.why not, anyway, most of the other characters are "justifiably ooc" so I guess it's okay. 


	6. Reason to Exist

Alright, seeing as my muse is threatening to make his pet dragon eat my entrails if I don't get my ass to work, and that sounds awfully messy and I don't feel like cleaning, I think I'll get my ass in gear and continue this story. So, here we go. Chapter six of "Before there was You". . .  
  
~~~  
  
"Before There Was You"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Six: Reason to Exist  
  
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She searched for the witch of Kunukanai, but what she was really searching for was a reason to exist, the reasons that she existed at all. She didn't know where she was from, where she belonged, and she wanted to know, really wanted to know. As they traveled, Kouga explained to her about the wars between the wolf and cougar youkai, how they disappeared, how Ajika of the Kunukanai was behind it all.  
  
And Kuma? She scowled deeply and said, "that's really pretty harsh. If you're right, I don't think I'll be able to forgive her, but I still want my answers first. I need to know who I am, that's really the most important thing right now. Then maybe.I'll be able to tear down the wall between us."  
  
"The wall?"  
  
"The wall between me, and the people I care about the most. I have to find out the truth, for them. Because if what I suspect to be true, is true, then they might never forgive me, for having been born."  
  
And she fell into silence. That was a place Kouga couldn't go, couldn't press, he knew. He was only a strange wolf helping her find her way, and with ulterior motives of his own as well. He couldn't ask that. He couldn't go there.  
  
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Sesshomaru was having second thoughts. He knew well enough that he would not allow Kuma to be hurt in any way, but also, he knew, this was something she had to do on her own, whatever it was, he'd seen it in her eyes that night. And also, he was impatient. Kuma traveled much faster than he did, and with the others slowing him down, it was more frustrating still.  
  
'She could be badly hurt before we even catch up to her!' his mind hissed.  
  
Almost as if sensing his thoughts, Inuyasha said quietly, "she'll be fine. Try not to worry so much.'  
  
Sesshomaru blinked. It was like Inuyasha was reading his mind lately. 'How does he do that! It's quite irritating!'  
  
"If it was Kagome, I'd probably be running on all cylinders to go rescue her. I don't really understand how you can be so calm, but I guess you were always like that."  
  
Sesshomaru sighed. "Calm? Don't worry? How can I not worry when she's chasing after some woman that even that moron, Naraku, fears. But still, do I have any right to interfere? I still don't know the answer to that. I just don't want to see her hurt."  
  
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"Yes, Haioh? What have you discovered from the swordsmith," Ajika asked levelly.  
  
"The reason you cannot find the girl, M'lady Ajika, is that a drop of Naraku's blood was used in the creation of the blade. Oudabi has betrayed you," Haioh said levelly.  
  
"I trust you have seen to his punishment?" Ajika asked with a snarl. 'Naraku! Still protecting your precious daughter, even now?'  
  
"He will.live forever, just as he wanted," Haioh answered, smirking wickedly. "If one can call THAT living."  
  
"As always, Haioh, it seems you are the only one that I can rely on."  
  
``` Elsewhere, the once great swordsmith, Deraku Oudabi sits in the corner, staring blankly, face contorted into an expression of fear. Occasionally, small squeaking noises escaped his throat. He was living out his worst nightmare while Zaru tried desperately to wake him, to no avail. Unknown to the young apprentice, his mentor will never wake, watching the pup's death over and over again, never able to save him, just barely able to brush fingers over his fur before the final blow is struck and the boy's blood splatters everywhere. For his betrayal, Deraku Oudabi spends eternity confronting his worst nightmare, and each time does not make it easier, because the dream is forgotten as easily as it is begun, each time is like the first, for the rest of his days, made longer by the very blood he doted after, Naraku's blood. Haioh had always been good at punishing the wicked, always.  
  
```  
  
"Thank you, Mistress," Haioh said evenly.  
  
"I've been thinking about time, quite a bit, Haioh, and have decided, I would like you to alter the future for me. I trust you are patient enough for the task?"  
  
"I am, the most patient man alive, you know that, Lady Ajika."  
  
"Hmn. Yes, I suppose I do. Take this shard then, and when the moon is in the proper phase, at the proper time, use it to destroy that girl's heart. I would like you, Haioh, to pretend to be a father to a child who fell through time, and then, ruin her. Kill her, or bend her to my will.it matters not, but do not fail me. I want her to return to the past, as she has, with a dark heart, or none at all, if she returns."  
  
"I understand."  
  
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Everyone was asleep for the night, or most everyone. Sesshomaru sat up, unable to rest with Kuma's predicament on his mind, and Miroku also, was still awake. Finally, though he knew it might be a deathwish to say something, Miroku spoke.  
  
"Stop beating yourself up for going after her," he said. "If you're together, really together like you claim, if you love each other that much, than her business IS your business. You're only doing what any of us would do. Inuyasha would be there for Kagome, I'd be there for Sango, even if she doesn't feel the same for me as I do for her. So it's your right, and your duty, as a man in love, to be there for Kuma. She'll forgive you, so just, be there for her. Give her what support you can, and when there's something she has to do with her own two hands, then let her, but stand by her side when she does it. Support her, let her support you, and stop thinking so much."  
  
Sesshomaru scowled at the monk. He didn't have any right to pry, but. . .he had given him advice about Kuma before, in this same regard, so, for the moment, he would. . .allow it. The human didn't mean any harm.  
  
His eyes glanced at the demon exterminator sleeping on the other side of the fire, and he mumbled, "you'll never know unless you ask," before letting his eyes drift shut. No, he wasn't asleep, but he didn't feel like talking anymore.  
  
Miroku sighed, looking longingly at Sango, and said softly, to himself, "perhaps," before brushing the hair from her eyes and looking at his cursed hand with a scowl. "But not yet."  
  
`````  
  
okay, another short chapter, but I think I know what probably happens next, and that should be in the next chapter, so, there it is! One, maybe two more chapters, if I'm correct. This story COULD have an epilogue too, but I don't think it will, b/c the arc is still going to continue after this story, so blah. I don't know how many more stories I'll write in this arc after this story though, two at least, maybe more. Anyway, thoughts, opinions? R&R.  
  
Also, for those of you who are reading this via FF.net, the last chapter, something went wiggy with the quotes and stuff, so I'm going to try to re- upload and replace that chapter and see if it works out. *crosses fingers* As always, those of you who reviewed, thanks so much.  
  
Until Next Time, Happy Haunting,  
  
~Banshee Puppet~ 


	7. Discovery and Despair

Alright, last chapter of "Before there was You".I got so much done today! Uh anyway, there will be more fics in this arc. So don't be mad at me for ending it where I did! *sticks out tongue* R&R. . .dorks. *grins*  
  
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"Before There Was You"  
  
by: Banshee Puppet  
  
Chapter Seven: Discovery and Despair  
  
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Ajika could hardly believe her luck. It seemed she wouldn't need Haioh's aid after all. The little kitten was walking right up to her. She didn't need the Kunukanai to see it, she was standing right there, before the steps, and with some unknown wolf youkai beside her.  
  
"Are you her?" the girl called up to her as she stood at the top of the stairs, smiling sweetly to hide her amusement. "Are you the witch of Kunukanai?" Kuma asked.  
  
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It was raining. She didn't like the rain one bit. Her only consolation was that Kouga was as miserable as she was.  
  
'That day. It was raining that day too,' she recalls, but she isn't certain what day she is remembering, or why the fact that it was raining is important.  
  
She sees the woman under the canopy of the porch, smiling easily and wearing a kimono of a deep blue shade, her markings pastel, her hair. . . 'the same shade as my own.'  
  
"Are you her?" she demands. "Are you the witch of Kunukanai?"  
  
"I am," Ajika answers. "To what do I owe the pleasure, little girl."  
  
'Little girl?! Like Hell!' the words anger Kuma, though she can't place why that is so.  
  
"I hear you want me dead. I came to tell me, you can come on and kill me if you want, but first, I want you to honestly answer my questions."  
  
She was an interesting one, brave, for someone who was about to die either way. 'I suppose I'll humor her. I'm going to kill her anyway, so it's not as if it matters.' "What do you wish to know?" she asks.  
  
"Who am I?" Kuma all but demanded, and pleaded. "That is to say. . .where do I come from, this world, or the future, and my parentage."  
  
"You are of this world," Ajika answered. "Your father," she smirked, telling her this truth would likely destroy the girl, knowing who her parents were. Never before had honesty felt so. . .wicked. "was the hanyou, Naraku, and your mother," she paused for dramatic effect as the name Naraku hit Kuma like a physical blow, but one she believed to be true, "is me," she chuckled. "Surely you can see the resemblance, can you not, poppet? Naraku was supposed to kill you a long time ago. Oh well," she shrugged. "I've answered your questions, now DIE!" Ajika sent a sonic wave towards the two.  
  
Kouga for his part, could only stare slack-jawed between the two women. 'Naraku and. . . Ajika. . . Kuma is. . .No. NO! I won't believe it!' The truth is, cougar hanyou or otherwise, Kuma and he had become friends these past few days. Even if she was the daughter of. . .did that really affect anything, did it change. . .who she was?'  
  
Her words came back to him. 'I want to know who I am, Kouga. I need to know, really. It's a fool's errand, this, and I know it. But for that knowledge. . .I would die, to know the truth.' And also, 'if what I suspect is true, even the one I love most might never forgive me. . .for being born.'  
  
Before he knew what was happening, she was pushing him out of the way. He blinked up to find she'd just barely deflected a powerful blast with her sword. 'Kuma is Kuma.' That's when he realized it. Nothing had changed. 'I don't want my friend to die,' he decided, getting up, even knowing he had little if any chance of being at all useful to her.  
  
"Kouga, what are you doing, get the hell out of here! Use the shards you have, and run! If you don't, you'll. . ."  
  
"You're still Kuma. You're just you. None of that other stuff matters at all. If it did, I'd run, I'd leave you do die. So I'm going to prove to you that nothing's changed, by fighting by your side. I'll die for that, if I have to."  
  
"Kouga-ahh-ow..aaahhh!" Kuma fell to her knees, clutching her skull, just vaguely registering Ajika's voice saying, "oh, isn't that sweet! The little puppy wants to die with her. Well, happy to oblige," as memory flooded her brain.  
  
The blood, all that blood. 'It was raining that day too. The day. . .they died.' It was important, because the rain washed the blood away, the blood that was on her hands, from the day, she killed her parents. Well, no, not her parents, but. . .the people who she thought were her parents. The woman with the dark hair, and the man. . .that man with the silver eyes. He touched her face and smiled sweetly. 'Shh, Kuma, it's alright. Daddy loves you. . .this will only hurt for a moment.' And then she remembers, standing in the rain, walking down the street aimlessly, her mind, totally blank. Had he. . .made her forget? The man with the silver eyes. . .but there WAS love in those eyes, she could tell. Whoever he was, at that time, even as she killed him for no apparent reason, he DID love her. He DID. As if convincing herself of that would change anything, make anything any better. But Naraku had not lied to her. He was. . .her father. She suspected, but she had hoped it wasn't true. The man who pushed her through the well, was him. But also, she knew, she couldn't go back. Those days, days with Naraku, days with her "parents", the day she, suddenly, blinded by animal instinct, fear, killed them, and then suddenly, realized what she had done, looking at the blood on her hands, the blood of. . . the people she killed. . .for no reason. The people she killed in cold blood.  
  
Her ears only vaguely registered sounds as she tried to fight back the dreams that were becoming far too real for her liking. Voices, calling her name, and someone, in front of her, falling.  
  
Her eyes widened as she suddenly returned to the present as a body tumbled limply into her own. Dark waves of hair falling into her line of vision. "Na-Naraku!" she gasped. "Wh-what? Why?"  
  
She took in the scene and realized that he had jumped in the way of a blow to protect her. He was badly injured. No, that was an understatement. He was dying.  
  
"Because," he whispered, coughing up blood. "Before there was you, I was heartless. Before there was you, I was free, my beautiful Kuma. . . my little girl." And his eyes rolled back, shutting with his last breath.  
  
Kuma, suddenly realized, she was angry. She laid Naraku down gently, not taking time to think about the irony of this all, the way things unfolded to make things true that never would have been true otherwise, never should have been true.  
  
She stood, drew the Kagura, tears in her eyes, and whispered, "you. . .bitch. That's totally. . .unforgiveable."  
  
"Oh, found a sudden love for our dear father, have we, Kuma?" Ajika mocked.  
  
"Bitch!" Kuma hollered. "He. . . he may have been an evil, sadistic bastard who wanted nothing more than to see my best friends killed, but. . .damnit! At least he cared! I'll. . . I'll destroy you!" And she charged.  
  
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Her friends. Her friends were all there, had actually just arrived when Naraku jumped in front of the blow. Sesshomaru was shocked, but a little relieved. He wouldn't have been able to make it in time. And Inuyasha? Inuyasha felt betrayed. Naraku was Kuma's father?!? When was she planning on telling them that little tidbit. Had she known, that day, the day she told him to back off and ran away? Had she known then? He knew he'd forgive her eventually, but right now, he was a little pissed, he couldn't see Kuma at all, he could only see Naraku's daughter.  
  
And Miroku, a tear rolled down his cheek as he looked at his hand. 'Finally.' Naraku. . .was dead. He looked up at Kuma and frowned. Somehow, he thought this would be a happier day.  
  
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And blood filled Kuma's vision once again. Killing her own mother, it had almost been. . .too easy. But then again, she'd done it before, hadn't she, and she realized suddenly, she was glad she did it. Glad that she killed Ajika, and that knowledge sent a shadow over her heart.  
  
'I can never go back. Things can never be the way things were. I can't guarantee that I won't hurt them. I can't guarantee. . .that some part of me, doesn't want to.'  
  
So, she sheathed the sword and began to walk away.  
  
'No! She's leaving! She's not coming back! NO!!!'  
  
"KUMA!" he blurted out, running a few steps towards her and, embarrassingly enough, tripping over an injured Kouga.  
  
"Ow," Kouga grumbled, propping himself up on his elbows.  
  
Kuma turned sad eyes onto the man she loved and whispered his name. "Sesshomaru," she said softly. "I'm so sorry. But. . .I can't. Goodbye."  
  
'Goodbye.' The word echoed through his mind long after she had gone. It felt like his heart had been ripped from his chest. He'd never felt like this, never been in this much pain. 'Her business is my business?' he thought, remembering Miroku's words. 'Yeah, right. But, monk, what if she gives up on us. What am I supposed to do then? What am I supposed to do, when she leaves?'  
  
Inuyasha bit his lower lip. Sesshomaru was in pain. It was obvious, not just to him, but to all of them, the way his clawed hand clutched at his chest and he just kneeled there in the wreckage, staring off in the direction Kuma had gone in.  
  
"Leave him alone," Miroku whispered to the hanyou. "There's nothing you can do for him."  
  
But that didn't stop Rin, who ran up to him, sniffling, and embraced him, burying her face in his long white tail. He wrapped his arms around her, and, unable to do anything else, unable to hold it back any longer, Sesshomaru cried.  
  
~The End~  
  
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Awwww! That was waayyy to sad!!! But I'm determined to make the arc have a happy ending, so I guess I've just got to keep writing until I've got one! There will be at least two more fics in this arc. A sidefic to this story, "love like water" which will talk about the time that Naraku was with baby Kuma before he pushed her into the well, and the next, time-wise will be "in cold blood", though I'm not sure when I'm going to write that. Probably not for a while yet. So anyway, R&R.the next fic on my, finish current fics I'm working on stitch will probably be my ff8 fic, "until the end of eternity, and longer"...so, hope you enjoyed this story. Until Next Time, Happy Haunting,  
  
~Banshee Puppet~ 


End file.
